This month (November) I’m focusing on body confidence on all my digital platforms. The ins and outs, the good and bad, the insecurities, diet culture, and many other things about this topic. Follow me on Instagram & subscribe to my YouTube so you don’t miss a beat.
Growing up, as soon as November came around, there was an obsession with losing weight through crash diets, detoxes, liquid fasts or whatever was trending that year. My mum’s side of the family and my dad’s too if full of bigger bodies so around this time (especially on my mum’s side) there was always pressure to get a beach body in time for the annual coast trip in December. I mean who doesn’t want to rock a cute swimsuit, small shorts and all the cute beach clothes when they’re at the beach? But even if we want to wear these clothes and feel cute and even if now we know that all bodies belong in the beach, our internalized imagery of what a beach body should look like can make us still feel uncomfortable. I mean it’s been years of internal and external shame about our body image, it can’t all be undone just because we’ve read a nice quote a couple of times and it’s okay to still feel uncomfortable.
midsize body | trans body | body with prosthetic leg
Nowadays it’s more common to see body positive content and more representation of diverse body types on the internet which is great, but that doesn’t erase all the insecurities that we have with our bodies. There’s still an ‘ideal’ body type that society seems to subscribe to, there’s still fatphobia, and body dysmorphia that a lot of us are struggling with. Even now, in 2022, when I picture the words ‘beach body’ or when I hear the words, more often than not, what comes to mind first is an able-bodied, thin, cis-gendered woman with a flat stomach. It’s a very specific imagery that’s not in any way representative of me.
If the recent surge of body representation has made you feel more confident that’s amazing, but that’s not the reality of many people. Representation can really be transformative, but it can’t undo years and years of internal and external shame, being bullied about appearances, body shaming, fatphobia, insecurities and body dysmorphia. These issues are long-standing and run deeper than some vibrant posts with large and small bodies, trans bodies, real skin (pimples, texture and scars), bodies in wheelchairs, body hair, and bodies with amputated limbs alongside an inspiring caption about something like ‘how to have a beach body, get your body on the beach’. And you might be able to accept and embrace body confidence intellectually, you might still feel guilt around ‘not having a perfect body’ and feel shame that you don’t love your body enough. But I’m here to remind you that it takes time and you’re already taking a step towards it by embracing body confidence intellectually.
plus size woman enjoying a pool party
With this wave of body confidence and body positivity, there’s an unrealistic pressure to love your body unconditionally all the time. A lot of us may identify with and be firm believers of body confidence but struggle with feeling like we’re not doing it right. Like maybe if you’re not comfortable with wearing certain types of clothes, you shouldn’t be calling yourself body positive. Or if you have days where you don’t like what you see in the mirror and you struggle to love your body then you’re not confident in your skin. However, it’s important to realize that there’s many steps between internalized fatphobia, body dysmorphia and/or body insecurities and body acceptance.
In fact, I like to think of it as a spectrum and you’re already on that spectrum, even by virtue of reading this post - you’re not stuck on one end and you’re making strides to move along the spectrum. Maybe we can start viewing it as a movement from body dislike, to body tolerance, to body connection, to body freedom, to body joy and confidence. Long story short, it’s okay if you’ve embraced ‘every body is a beach body’ but haven’t taken your body to the beach in a bikini or your desired swimwear. It’s okay, you’re still making progress, you’re valid, I see you and you’re not alone. Stay tuned to my YouTube on Tuesday where I’ll be posting some practical, gentle tips on getting more comfortable with your beach body as it is. So subscribe & hit the notification bell so you don’t miss it.